From: Paul Dixon - Ladd Hill Bible Church (pauld@iclnet93.iclnet.org)
Date: Wed Dec 20 1995 - 11:42:02 EST
Just thought I'd bring everybody up to date on the squirrel dilemma.
Here is a summary of the helpful and not so helpful (though humorous)
responses.
1. Despite the fact I explicitly urged readers to interpret my
words 'we have squirrels in the attic' literally, some persisted in
forcing their nonliteral hermeneutic on the words and concluded I had
gone a little looney, or that perhaps a good dose of Calvinistic reading
would do the trick.
2. Others, like Job's friends, pounced on me and my behavior as
the sure cause. BTW, Jim, you've got to get rid of that bad tic (tongue
in cheek).
3. Some, apparently still caught up in the baptism debate,
figured I ought to thoroughly reform those nasty critters by immersing
them a good long while.
4. Finally, some interpreted the words normatively and with
compassion (not to say laughter is not good medicine) responded with
helpful ideas, namely:
a. Ferrets make good pets and they hate squirrels. Get one.
b. Try mothballs in the attic.
C. Get Hav-a-Heart traps (seriously), make a lot of
noise to scare them out, set the traps, wait a day or 2, then have a
heart and release them in another neighborhood.
d. Use fox urine. Nobody likes the smell too much and
apparently neither do the squirrels.
e. Use illegal traps and kill the buggers.
f. After they are eradicated board up the entrances or
use chicken wire.
Thanks gang for all your help. I feel well armed for the fray.
Dr. Paul S. Dixon
Pastor, Ladd Hill Bible Church
Wilsonville, Oregon
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