Discrimination among women just doesn't seem possible. After all, women are considered the gentler gender, and if they're feminists, discrimination is an impossibility, right? Well I hate to burst your bubble, but it's time to remove those rose-colored glasses from your eyes. As a businesswoman, I thought I could count on my fellow women for their support just because we share the same gender.

Thanks to a conference my company is hosting this spring, my rose-colored glasses cleared so I could see the truth about human nature. Notice I said human nature rather than women. That's because I can accept the fact that women are no different from their male counterparts. Greed, insecurities, cliques, and of course hate, be it racial, religious, ethnic, or marital, are to be found in both sexes.

Did I say marital hate? Yes, there are so many women in this world carrying marital baggage from decades gone by. Mentioning a lifetime of singleness can send shivers down the bravest of those women's backs. . . why? According to the founding fathers (and mothers) of our cultures, women are happiest in marriage and motherhood; to have happiness any other way would be a sure sign of an unfulfilled woman. Here we are on a dead run towards the new millennium and women are facing the same subliminal and many times vocal pressures from family, friends, and the media to find themselves a mate and "be in bliss" before it's too late.

That "liberation movement" stuff women preached in the 60s and 70s didn't do much to help its many followers deal with gender expectations properly. Instead it taught women to shove it to the background and hope against hope they're not the poor sap over the age of 30 without a love interest. Imagine my surprise when I approached some well-known businesswomen for sponsorship of the First Annual International Leather Spinsters Conference and they gave me a cold shoulder. The name itself scared them, but then when I explained to them what the title was referring to, a conference to celebrate happily unmarried women, the grits hit the fan. Before I could finish explaining how unwed women need to see life without a mate as positive and satisfying, I was ushered out of their offices. One woman actually said, "Single women are a hopeless cause!" as she closed the door in my face.

What's so bad about women choosing to live alone? If I were to judge by those businesswomen's attitudes, I would think they had some issues about being without a mate. Going back to my reference to the women's liberation movement, how can women honestly say they're liberated if they still cringe at the thought of not belonging to someone else. Can women not feel complete and fulfilled belonging to themselves? Liberation means set free; to react the way those so-called feminists did to a conference for single women is not liberated—much less feminist.

When will women learn to walk the walk? For over 20 years feminists touted how different women were from men; to them, that meant we women should support one another in whatever way we need to. I guess if they had said we should support those "sisters" who make acquiring committed relationships their main agendas in life, they would've been making a more accurate statement.

No, I'm not bitter. I'm saddened by the lack of support single women receive from their own gender. They need not look to society at large for positive feedback for not choosing to wed, but they should be able to rely upon other women's support. I'm used to hearing people, mainly middle-aged women, pitying their unmarried counterparts as if they have some sort of dreaded disease. But I never thought singlehood fright would cause any anger or embarrassment. When the time arrived for those "liberated feminists" to support other women, they backed away from having to face their own "shortcomings" because they too, were unmarried women.

Before women can ever declare themselves liberated, they must first come to terms with those deeply ingrained myths that they need mates to feel complete and happy.

Drawing by Emily McClain